When Mr Dog Bites - Brian Conaghan

Dylan Mint has Tourette's. His life is a constant battle to keep the bad stuff in - the swearing, the tics, the howling dog that seems to escape whenever he gets stressed... But a routine visit to the hospital changes everything. Overhearing a hushed conversation between the doctor and his mother, Dylan discovers that he's going to die next March. So he decides to grant himself three parting wishes, or 'Cool Things To Do Before I Cack It'. Number one on the list is to have 'real' intercourse with his stunning and aloof classmate Michelle Malloy. Secondly, Dylan pledges to 'fight heaven and earth, tooth and nail, dungeons and dragons' so that his best friend Amir can find a new 'best bud'. And finally he has to get his dad back from the war so that mum can stop crying so much. It's not a long list, but it's ambitious, and he doesn't have much time. But as Dylan sets out to make his wishes come true, he discovers that nothing - and no-one - is quite as he had previously supposed.